Just found a guy name Vicky who is fuckin' hilarious!!!
LOL! Chicken Nut Bread! Seriously will laugh until chicken nut bread!
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
Chicken Nut Bread
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Just found a guy name Vicky who is fuckin' hilarious!!!
LOL! Chicken Nut Bread! Seriously will laugh until chicken nut bread!
Posted by
Victor Tan
at
3:04 AM
0
shots of whisky
[1.06.08] At Pavilion carpark taking a smoke with Miss Confletely
Ms Confletely: A guy should accept a girl as a wHOLE!
Me: HAHAHAHAH!!! Damn Right wei!
[6.06.08] At KFC with Jason, my beverage manager
Jason:How do you say chicken breast in Malay ah?
Me: Err... what already ah?
Jason: Isit Ayam tetek?
Me: AHHAHAHAHHA!!!
[6.06.08] Interviewing Jack on the phone
Me: By the way, Jack.. what position you're applying for?
Jack: Assistant manager lor. Can ah?
Me: Sure... *just realized something* (Jack ass. Manager) *laugh* oops!
Jack: hehe... ?!?!?
[6.06.08] Talking to a hot chick, Shanel in the club
Shanel: Hey, you're my brother mah
Me: What?! No no no no no.... Eh, you cannot just destroy all my hopes like that you know. A least you leave some hope for me la...
Shanel: *lol* Ok.. ok.. Darling!!!
Me: *woohooo* Can we kiss now?
Shanel: -_-"
[17.05.08] Calling the wrong Maggie
Me: Hi.. er *omg i think I call wrong person* is this Maggie ?
Maggie: Yes..
Me: *hailat what to say?* you know me right?
Maggie: yess.. you're Victor la!
Me: *who is this who is this??!* errm.. we met in Velvet ya?
Maggie: yalor.. we met last Wednesday mah
Me: Oh ... just double checking.. so tonight Velvet ok?
Maggie: Don't kno... see how la. Will call ok?
Me: *phew* ok! (now where is the number to the Maggie I wanted to call... *checks phone*
[29.04.08] In velvet with Sylvia
Me: Hey, that guy is your bf isit?
Sylvia: No lah, he is just chasing me..
Me: *doubtful* Eh, ask him to run faster k
Sylvia: why?
Me: coz I see him here with you so much still cannot get you. And one more thing... I'm a very fast runner k. *wink*
[21.03.08] SMsing Allan
Me: Eh, come earlier to Barclub tonight lah. You're always late. Not nice if I occupy the table first
Allan: Dun worry, just find Hisham
Me: I know the manager lah. Although not as V.I.P as you but I'm V.I.C mah
Allan: I don't get it. Your name?
Me: V.I.C = Very Important Clubber. *ekkekek*
[2.02.08] Talking to drunk friend on Msn
Friend:never get committed with a chick
Me: Y?
Friend: no point
Me: got two points wat..*hehe*
[5.11.07] In a Thai Bar, stuck in a pretty nasty situation
Thai Girl: Wai yuu tance wif tha ger? Yuu no liee me?
Me: Liee liee?
Thai Girl: *pulls me back*
Me: but but... I want to dance with her
Thai Girl: Cum we go hodeel.. tree dousand baht yuu gimmee.. I follow yuu hodeel
Me: I liee her! I liee her!
[22.9.07] On the phone trying to get my celebrity friend to come for a photoshoot (not paid)
Me:Hey, are you free on Sunday? My friend is having a photoshoot and I thought you should come.
Celebrity: How much they paying?
Me: Err..they are not. It is just a photoshoot amongst friends but will be used on board advertisement
Celebrity: Erm, Victor.. you know I get paid like RM12,000 for my last shoot and next month I'll be in all the starbucks in Malaysia. Not to mention I was in HerWorld ..page 56, ya da ya da
Me: *snore* Nevermind la... it's ok
[29.8.07] In velvet talkin to a sexy girl
Girl: so what do you do?
Me: Very hard to explain, but I'm a market analyst la...by day and by night *kekek*
Girl: Oh..sounds very technical. Is it a hard job?
Me: *kekek* Yea man...its hard...It's damn HARD
[3.6.07] After dinner, in car with Zosey
Me:So you know how to come here next time?
Zosey: *shakes head* I'm Snoopy's sister.
Me: huh? Snoopy's sister?
Zosey: Yeap...Snoopy's sister...stoopi'd mah!
Me: *speechless* *akkakaka*
[5.7.07] In the car after movies with Alexandra
Me:Sigh, dunno when I'm going to see Transformers -_-. Some more next week I'm going S'pore
Alexandra: Dun worry la, they will stay here at least 3 weeks
Me: (cheeky mode) Which hotel?
Alexandra: huh?
Me: *lol* You say they stayin here mah? I wanna visit them. =P
[11.6.07] At the mamak with friends talkin bout squirtin' girls
Danny:Eh...Victor, tell la...who squirt?
Me: Cannot leh...but you know her one..
Danny: Yea la, but gimme clue...first letter...who who?
Me: Sorry man...you gotta find out urself.
Danny: *thinks really hard and looked really horny*
(half an hour later)Danny: sqquiirt squirt...piuuu piuuuu!! wah shioook...tell la Victor!!
Everyone: KAkakaAKAKa!! u still thinkin bout it!! *kkekekek*
[3.6.07] On the phone with Joanne Wong
Joanne:Hie...
Me: Hey, will you marry me?
Joanne: huh? Is that how you ask everyone?
Me: Nooo.. I rolled 2. I mean out of the six cups, if I roll two I gotta drink. So I told everyone I would ask you to marry me if I hit two
Joanne: *speechless*
[25.5.07] On MSN with "Leen"
Leen:Why never go out? I thought got guest dj and alot of chickatiu
Me: *LOL* What the hell is chickatiu?
Leen: I don't know how you spell it...
Me: *Deng!* Chickadee isit? *LOL* Chickatiu..(Singaporeans -_-")
[12.3.07] On MSN with "Baby"
Me:Get a cam so I can see you
Baby: Dowan...I'm in my workin shirt
Me: That is okei wat! (Thinks for a sec)
Me: *Deng!* Only???
Baby: Yeap!
Me: *Jump in to car and drives off at 2000kph
[24.2.07] In Velvet SNL with MsPetite
MsPetite: I want her boobs, I'm a girl but I can't help but stare at her boobies
Me: *Lol* Eh, she is my friend's wife wei. Now you make me look!! -_-
MsPetite: I want! I want!
Me: *Deng!* Ok...I try to help you later make big =P
[12.2.07] In Red Bar with MsPetite
MsPetite: I need my partner to make me cum else I'll be very angry
Me: *Lol* Don't tell me you're so sexed up? I didn't know wei
MsPetite: Yes, I'm. *sexy smile*
Me: *Deng!* I think I'm in love *LMAO*
[10.2.07] On the way to zouk having conversation about 'Friendster'
Pei Ying: He deleted my photos when we break up and den change his status to single! Grr
Me: Lol..Ok. What is the big deal la...it is jus friendster wei. You girls and friendster. Sigh.
Pei Ying: I don't care! I think 30 year old man should be banned from using friendster!! They are too old for that! So CHILDISH! Grrrr
Me: *Deng!* (better shut up right about now)
[5.2.07] Lying on my bed and shouted to my maid
ME: KAk! Ambil 100 plus dan air! (bring me 100plus and water)
Maid: Ok OK!
(Appeared with water and a pack of handyplus) -_-
[5.2.07] Ovid'i'a called me at 1.30 am
Ovidia: Hey! I can't sleep!
Me: *DenG!* (Yay, gonna get lucky!)How come?
Ovidia: I went checkin on your blog and YOU SPELLED MY NAME WRONGLY AGAIN!
ME: Huh?! Where got? How issit spelled (omg! and I thought I got it right finally!)
Ovidia: Its OVIDIA!
Me: oppps! =P
[31.1.07] At the bar counter in New Asia Bar, S'pore takin a smoke after dinner at Equinox.
Ovidea: Darn it, its so cold. My nipples are hard.
Me: *DenG!* Okei.. you know that is going to be in my head for the rest of the night. Damn you! *Lol
[31.1.07] Seth called me on the phone while I was in S'pore.
Seth: Wei brother, tonight how? You going mambo ar?
Me: *grins* Yeap, I'm
Seth: Ooo.. cool cool. So what time you going? Meet you there at 11 same time?
Me: *Burst out laughing* Cannot meet you la, I going Mambo, but Mambo S'pore. *Lol*
Seth: DIU!!
[31.1.07] Dancing with a Singaporean gal at Mambo, Zouk Singapore
Me: (Went and talk to the guy next to her) Err.. is that your girlfriend?
Him: Yeap.
(Somehow still ended up dancin)
Me: That is your boyfriend ar?
S'porean chick: *smiles* NO LA!
Me: *DenG!*
